Options Used In Overcoming Hurt And Pain

By Shirley Martin


Emotional pain is something that many of us, if not all have had to endure at one point or the other. The source of the hurt is often an intimate partner, a close relative or friend. The unfortunate thing is that when not dealt with, this feeling has the potential to destroy all the aspects of our lives. There are a number of things that we can to help us with overcoming hurt and pain.

It is important to appreciate that the healing process takes time. In some cases, it also involves making sacrifices and working hard towards recovery. If you are in a conflict situation, your first step should be to get out of it; walk away. The importance of this is that it gives you time to cool off and to take charge of the situation. If this does not happen, there is a risk of being involved in unpleasant impulsive behavior.

Once you walk away from the confrontational situation, the next step is to engage oneself in a moment of reflection. Think about the events that took place before, during and immediately after the event. Attempt to gain some insight in your behavior during all these times. Is there a different way you would have acted? Although your temper may flare further strive to remain calm.

After the period of reflection you will be ready to meet the other individual. Many times, our hurt is the result of misinterpreting facts in spite of good intentions from them. Have a mindset that can readily accommodate divergent views so as to understand what it is they meant exactly. Getting a clarification means that you should be ready to listen.

To avoid aggravating an already strained relationship, think carefully before you speak. Avoid getting too argumentative or aggressive. Even if you realize that the other person is the wrong, there is no point forcing them to apologize. This rarely works and even if they were to apologize it is not likely to be genuine. If they volunteer to apologize then be willing to forgive and to forget. Understand that people make mistakes from time to time.

In some situations, getting the opportunity to sort out the differences may be too difficult due to the hostility of the person involved or if getting to them is not practically possible. If you find yourself with such a challenge, there are still several other things that can be done. One of them is to shift focus and to think about the positives in our lives rather than the negatives.

Accepting responsibility is another measure that you also need to consider. The hurt that people feel tends to be worse when they consider other people to be solely responsible for their problems. It helps to accept responsibility for the events that led to your current situation. It is only when you take full control that you can dictate what you feel now and in future.

Make a point of sharing the problem with a close friend or relative. Sharing will help you vent and get rid of negative thoughts. Friends help us in understanding situations from different perspectives. You may realize that you really should not be harboring your current feelings.




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